The Surreal Life

I suddenly realized I work in the mecca for bloggers, not just bloggers but mommy bloggers (a term I loathe) and remembered that I had a blog. Well mine's only been "mommy" for two years now and as you can see, that "mommy" part means I have no time to post. And so I wonder... How are those OTHER women finding time to post? And make sense? And not just sense, but money? (WHA?) Instead I feed the beast that is my carefully balanced working life. Out at 9, in by 7 every day, and the hours before, after, and on weekends are all about kidcare. But when you've got the world's most charming children, there's hardly much to complain about. The work part, another story.

Since this last post a zillion years ago we've done all kinds of superfun things like swimming lessons and beach cafes and birthday parties and the county fair, and even a week in Seattle to visit the grandparents. So much fun - they loved it - and from Burbank, the trip was actually easy. Both babies are getting expert at dancing, tooth-brushing on the stepstool, kissing and more kissing, identifying letters, singing songs, watching YouTube on i-devices, picking out clothes, drinking from a cup, and resisting diapering and bedtime, but not cuddles.

The biggest change, perhaps is that we made a decision this month to put Liv and Wy in daycare. So, on Monday, off they go. I knew I'd be sad in acknowledging that the time is right - they're not babies anymore. What no one tells you to prepare for, though, is that day when you need to fire your nanny. What a stressful, stressful time. I had to go over it in my head many times before I got the gumption. And I did it. And she got teary. And asked if it was because she's doing a bad job. All that. Three more days of awkwardness...

Meanwhile my real worry is whether the kids will like it better - because I want what's best for them, sure, but what I really want is for them to be joyously happy as they are now, every night, when we get home from work. No more ecstatic little faces in the lit window as we drive in. I'll miss that. Instead, it'll be just us 3, every morning, off in the car on a new daily adventure. (I'll have drop-off duty). I wish the so-called terrible twos would last forever.

Natalie Merchant & Me

Cut to - July? What is wrong with me? Well I think it isn't necessarily that there is no time - there is time, at say, 10 p.m. nightly but that's about the time your brain is fried and back is breaking and being articulate doesn't sound all that possible - or appealing. There have been few variations to the regular schedule in recent months and by regular schedule I mean: M-F Akhil is up at 6, at work by 7, I have an hour or so with the babes until taking off at 9 sharp when Ana arrives, and after work, around 6:30 or 7, we either round the block with the red wagon or pink plastic stroller apparati or sit on the swinging bench and get to know the flowers in the front yard. Occasionally, our 6-yr-old neighbor, Chloe, comes over.

Weekends - well, Akhil is back to working Saturday mornings and I've come to enjoy my solo time with the charming twosome. We spend a lot of time walking the 'hood, cruising through the aisles at Target, or hanging at the playground park. These are the days, I'm sure of that. One Saturday I was strolling through the farmer's market with Liv and Wy in the stroller after we'd spent about 2 hours playing at the adjacent park. I was buying green beans, plum tomatoes, and freshly baked bread. People were smiling, sun was shining... I thought, what the heck else is life about, really? This is it.

Liv's charm in a can and her dance moves have become rather exceptional; while Wyatt is really tuned into what's going on with your relationship with him. When he gets in trouble, he knows, and he says in a desperate, elfin voice, "Hi." "Hi." Until you smooth it over and make it ok. They won't have it if you don't give them their nightly couch cuddle in front of the "V" (TV) so we spend an hour or more on that before bed. Though they're talking a lot, we don't necessarily know what they're saying, but Wyatt likes to say "Bye" to things he's done with or doesn't like, like "Bye, diaper," or "Bye wawah" -- sometimes "Bye mama" - while Liv finds a lot of opportunities to say "Wyatt," "bird" and "flowah."

Egads, it's not quite a year later and if we weren't totally consumed by the balancing act that is life as working parents (without grandparental help!) then we sure are now. Liv and Wyatt are never-ending silliness and joy, with distinctly different but delightfully complementary personalities. They have figured out how to play together and sometimes, even share.

It's a rainy Saturday, St. Patrick's Day, and napping is occurring while Akhil is at the office and I am here putzing around the house. Putzing doesn't last long...

Since last May we have flown to Boston and back, and Maui and back, without a single post. We've done a lot of other things too, mostly on the weekends, and if there was a way to scrape Outlook email I'd have much of the milestones nicely recorded. It'll have to suffice to say that the babies are ok-travelers. Once they get to a destination, they're expert! The parts that have turned out to be the most painful are the rides in the car. Too much like bondage.

A few months ago I was saying work was easy, weekends were work. Well, that's not true anymore, and that's a nice surprise, cuz' they're still just babies. With a lot of teeth. That said, that "office work" thing is 5-years stale. I wouldn't mind a 2012 changeup. It takes thought and time to produce such changeup, and that's the challenge. Time is a scarce resource for someone like me who requires 8 hours of nightly sleep. But I'm feelin' it.

Oh, rain. We totally have the best babies, you know. They don't come any better. Just look at these people. Premium. This set of pics was taken on the day of the big 4-0 (MY big 4-0) in Manhattan Beach. A day off of work. Pancakes and coffee. Sunny in January. My parents were here. Akhil threw a surprise brunch. And bought me a fancy present (24-70 zoom lens!). And got a Porto's carrot cake, and takeout dinner. It was lovely. And so far, I really don't mind.

At this age, people really do assume you know better, and know what you're doing, and leave you alone.